How to Handle a Highlander Page 16

  “I do nae think we have ever truly been alone,” she said.

  He followed her with a lazy pace. “Last night we were. Yet it was a stolen moment. Too quickly finished.”

  Her cheeks heated, and she looked away from him, searching for her self-discipline. He caught up to her and cupped her chin, turning her gently around to face him. It felt so right to be wrapped in his embrace, as though she’d been longing for it since he left her.

  “This is no different,” she said.

  He reached up to gently rub the nape of her neck. “Because ye are going to be leaving soon?”

  She bit her lip. “Of course.”

  He pressed a kiss to her lips, lingering before breaking their embrace just long enough to let her nipples pucker. “I would show ye the difference, Moira.” He stepped back and offered her his hand. “Come with me. Come, because ye know ye are nae Achaius’s wife.”

  “Because I want to be yer lover?” she questioned softly.

  He nodded, his eyes narrowing.

  She knew she shouldn’t, but it felt wrong to refuse. Like she was lying to herself. The hawks were still circling above and would be for hours. It seemed Athena had the right idea.

  She placed her hand in his, and satisfaction filled his eyes. He turned and began to lead her deeper into the forest. The sunlight filtered through the trees, and the birds called to one another.

  A stone house came into view, the walls made of smooth rocks from the river. There was a huge water wheel on the side of it, waiting for the harvest and the grinding of flour.

  “No one will bother us here,” he said.

  Gahan opened the door and pulled her inside. He slid the bar across the door and winked at her as he took the long sword off his back and laid it near the door.

  “I doubt we are the only couple who finds this a good place to spend an afternoon,” he offered in a wicked tone.

  Suddenly shy, she took a hesitant step away from him and looked around the mill. There was a large grinding stone with gear shafts that ran through the wall to the wheel. Large levers were set into the wall for lowering the wheel. It would take at least four strong men to operate it. Long tables lined the walls. There was a stack of empty sacks on one, waiting for the next season’s grinding.

  “Come here, Moira.” His tone was soft and inviting.

  But when she looked at him, she shook her head and bit her lower lip.

  He pulled on the fingers of his gauntlet and set it aside on one of the tables. She expected him to disrobe, but he crossed his arms and considered her first. His silence prompted her more than a probing question might have.

  “I just realized that I do nae know ye at all.”

  Understanding dawned on his face. “So ye wonder if ye are a fool for trusting me?”

  “I know I am a fool.” It was an admission, a confession that came from her heart. “I should be trying to catch me husband’s eye, but…”

  “But he leaves ye cold?”

  She sighed. “Ye are being overly naughty, Gahan Sutherland. Have ye no shame?”

  He had only been toying with her, letting her think she had left him behind. With a burst of speed, he captured her once more and began pulling the pins from her hair.

  “Shame? Nay, Moira, I have naught when it comes to ye.” He combed his hands through her hair, freeing it of the braid. He gathered it up and lifted it in a bundle and buried his face in it, drawing a deep breath.

  “Ye draw me to ye with an intensity that overrules everything I know I should do. The right and wrong I’ve been taught dissolves into the pure rightness I feel when I touch ye.”

  He backed up and undid the few buttons on his doublet that were closed. He tossed the garment aside, and it hit the table with a thud.

  “I want to strip ye and see the sunlight on yer skin.” He pulled on the end of the wide leather belt that kept his kilt around his lean waist. With a tug, it loosened, and he caught the pleats of tartan before they slithered down his legs. He tossed the plaid on one of the side tables.

  “I want to stretch ye out on me plaid and see me colors behind ye as I sink into yer body again.”

  He yanked his shirt off and tossed it aside. She couldn’t resist letting her stare slide down his body. Every muscle was defined, and his cock stood erect, making her crave him.

  He cupped her chin and raised her head so their gazes locked. “Shame? Nay, Moira, I have naught. All there is when I am near ye is desire, and it is thick enough to choke me.”

  “Ye make me tremble,” she admitted.

  Gahan chuckled as he spun her around. He attacked the laces on her gown and pulled the wool garment over her head. Her undergown didn’t pose any challenge to him either. It fluttered onto one of the tables, and she discovered herself hesitating before turning around.

  Gahan embraced her from behind, tucking her head beneath his chin. His cock nestled against her back and his skin was warm. For a moment he held her still, and a shiver shook her, raising gooseflesh along her limbs. He smoothed them with slow strokes of his hands before gently cupping her breasts, making her moan with pleasure. She turned, needing to be able to touch him.

  Approval flashed in his eyes, making her bold. She reached out and stroked his cock. His lips thinned, filling her with confidence. She closed her fingers around his shaft, gripping it gently as she stroked it from base to head.

  “Where did ye learn to do that?” His voice was husky, and he groaned as she repeated the motion. It seemed impossible to be affecting him so intensely, and it made her feel powerful.

  “Bari sent me to the mews, and there are many who thought it a fine place to tryst. Some did nae care to check very carefully that they were in fact alone.” She stretched up to kiss him, wanting to be the one setting their pace for a change. Need was twisting through her, but she felt in control of it this time, and she stretched up to press her lips against his more firmly.

  He held her face in his hands and teased her mouth with the tip of his tongue. Opening her lips was a natural progression instead of the surrender it had been before. She stroked his cock again as he thrust his tongue into her mouth. The combination of control and invasion was enough to make her knees weak, but she refused to surrender.

  She craved companionship, and for that, she would need to give as much pleasure as she received. Her memory offered up something else, something so forbidden she’d shied away from thinking about it until now. She broke their kiss and resumed toying with his erection. “I saw a few other things, too.” His eyes widened, but she didn’t give him the chance to question her. Her confidence was high, making her bold beyond measure. “Ye are nae the only one who wants to see the other by the light of day.”

  She sank to her knees, maintaining her grip on his erect staff. It was ruby-red and stiff, but the skin was soft beneath her fingertips.

  “Moira…ye cannae mean to…”

  She looked up at him, stroking his length as she locked eyes with him. “I know men like it, whatever it’s called.”

  She didn’t wait for him to tell her the term. She returned her attention to his cock and opened her mouth. She licked it first, a tiny lap at the slit on its head.

  “Sweet fucking Christ!” he swore as he jumped back.

  “Christ never did such a thing.” She got to her feet and followed him. “And do nae bring Him up. There is naught here that is permissible.”

  He took her back in his embrace and toyed with her nipples and the globes of her breasts. “I think the Almighty has a great deal to do with the pleasure we find in each other’s touch,” he said. “Who else might have created such a need to seek it out when the reality of life does nae favor it?”

  She didn’t know, but she feared talking about it. She didn’t want to discuss anything, because that would take her back to reality. She turned in his arms, reaching up to slip her hands over his short-cut beard.

  “I’m a coward, Gahan, for I do nae want to talk. There are too many facts that might come u
p, and I’d rather enjoy me chance to be yer lover.”

  She pressed a kiss against his chest and then began to lower herself as she bent her knees. She kissed her way to where his cock jutted up from his belly. Closing her fingers around it, she stroked it, then licked the slit once more.

  He groaned, restoring her confidence. She let it warm her and destroy the doubts that had snuck in to needle her. The next time she licked him, she drew her tongue all the way around the crown of his cock. He caught her head, his fingers threading through her hair. He thrust toward her, the jerk of his hips seeming compulsive, as though he had no control.

  She liked that idea.

  Let him be at her mercy for a change. She opened her mouth and let the head of his cock enter. He grunted, and the sounds pleased her; they meant more than polished words, for they were pure response. She pulled her head back then leaned forward to take more of his length inside her mouth.

  “God, ye’ll unman me!” He pulled free, earning a frustrated moan from her.

  “Good!” She cupped the sacs hanging beneath his cock. “I believe it is far past time for ye to be the one being overwhelmed.”

  Gahan captured her hair and held her firmly until she looked up at him. “Ye are nae a coward, Moira Fraser. Ye’re a woman who is honest, and that I admire above all else.”

  No matter where she ended up in life, she was certain she would always remember the look of approval in his eyes. It was more than lust, more than desire.

  But need was twisting inside her, so she resumed her assault on his member, sucking it deeply into her mouth and teasing the head with the tip of her tongue. It grew harder, the sac holding his seed tightening as the first drops eased from the slit on its head. But he pulled free, refusing to let her draw his full measure.

  “I need to be inside ye, Moira.” He scooped her off the floor and laid her on the rumpled length of his plaid. For a moment, he stared at her, the look of fierce possession on his face so intense she felt scorched.

  But she reached for him, opening her arms in welcome. He covered her, stretching her arms above her head as she clasped him between her thighs.

  “Ye’re mine, Moira…mine,” he breathed against her neck as he thrust deep inside her.

  She lifted her hips to take him, groaning with delight. It shouldn’t have felt so good, but it was pure rapture every time he pressed his length into her. There was only the rightness of the way they felt together, the building pleasure making ready to break inside of her.

  When it burst, she cried out, tightening her hold around her lover. He strained toward her, thrusting his cock as deep as possible. Her breasts bounced with his motions until he stiffened and released his seed. She could feel the insides of her passage contracting around his staff, as if she were milking him. She couldn’t move for a long time, her lungs laboring for breath and her heart pounding so hard it felt as though it might break through her chest.

  None of it mattered. All she cared about was the feeling of Gahan’s heart racing along with hers. He rolled off her and lay on the table, then gathered her close, covering her with his plaid.

  At last she tried to rise, but he held her tight. She rubbed his chest, soaking up a last feel of him before gently pushing at him.

  “I suppose ye are right, though I have no liking for it,” he grumbled in response.

  He let her rise. He swung his feet over the edge of the table and stood as she found her undergown. The side lacing allowed her to close it herself. Gahan frowned but grabbed his shirt and put it on too. He pleated his kilt then leaned back against the table to grasp the ends of the belt to buckle it around his waist.

  “Do nae,” Gahan warned her softly, menacingly.

  She turned around and looked at him in confusion.

  “Do nae look ashamed,” he clarified as he shrugged into his doublet and worked the silver buttons closed. They drew her attention, reminding her of just who he was.

  “I swear I’ll sleep in yer bed tonight if ye do nae stop looking so guilty.”

  “Ye will nae.” She lifted her chin and held his gaze. “And do nae bluster at me, Gahan Sutherland. Ye know as well as I the reasons we cannae do such a thing. Ye are nae a man who forsakes his duty. I could nae love a man who did nae have honor.”

  She realized what she’d said and gasped. “I did nae mean—”

  “Aye, ye did.” He moved toward her, and she retreated, shaking her head. She bumped into the wall, and he caged her there with a hand flattened on the wall on either side of her head. She didn’t want to meet his gaze, didn’t want to see confirmation of just how foolish she was.

  “It humbles me, lass, for I have done little to deserve it.”

  There was sincerity in his voice. She looked up against her better judgment and found his eyes glassy with emotion. But it was too much; she knew she could never have him. She ducked beneath his arm.

  “We must nae say such things.” Tears burned her eyes, but she forbade herself to cry. There would be plenty of time for tears when she was back on Matheson land.

  “Saer knows the truth of yer marriage.”

  She turned to look at him. “I know. He told me so. Do ye mean to drive me mad?”

  “I mean to expose yer brother and Achaius for the liars they are,” he insisted.

  She turned around so he might lace her gown. Frustration was destroying the bliss of the moment. She drew in a deep breath and let it out as he finished closing her gown.

  “What do ye mean by that sound, Moira?” he demanded softly.

  She turned and met his challenge. But he didn’t care for the calm acceptance on her face.

  “What do ye expect to come of exposing them? There is naught good about this entire situation. For all that Achaius is deceiving the world about our marriage, at least it gives me a place to go beyond Bari’s reach. Expose him, and I will have to return to me brother’s land.”

  “Ye’ll come to me,” he insisted.

  “A Fraser inside Dunrobin? I think yer father will have something to say about that. If no, I am sure yer brother will, and it will nae be words of welcome.”

  He opened his mouth but shut it again. She shook her head. “As I said, naught good can come of this. That is why it’s forbidden.”

  He reached for her, cupping her face, and she rubbed her cheek gently against his hand.

  “Forbidden, and yet I crave it.”

  He wrapped his arms around her, holding her tightly for a long moment. “Just as ye crave it. I refuse to believe there is no way to have ye for me own.”

  “Yer mistress, perhaps.” She gently pushed her way free. “Achaius is short in years. But I wonder, Gahan, do ye wish our children to be bastard-born?”

  “Ye insult me to ask such a thing,” he growled. “I would take ye to the church.”

  “Yer father would never allow it,” she insisted firmly. “And he might easily disown ye, which is something I will nae take a chance upon.”

  “Are ye saying ye will nae wed me?”

  She lost the battle to keep her tears from falling. Several trickled down her cheeks before she drew in a shaky breath to restore her composure.

  “That is what I’m saying, Gahan. The cost would be too great for ye. It is more than the position ye enjoy. It would strike at the relationship ye have with yer sire, and I can see that is a dear thing to ye. I have no wish to be the woman who sours it. ”

  He didn’t care for her answer. Rage flickered in his eyes, but a moment later he surprised her by grinning. “Ye do love me, Moira.” He nodded, his expression full of confidence. “Ye do.”

  ***

  It was true. She did love him. The ride back to Dunrobin was too short because she needed to banish her emotions before others witnessed her eyes shining with unshed tears. But she could not pull her mare to a stop and linger, because Gahan had warned her he’d be leaving just long enough after her to throw off suspicion. She crossed into the castle and slid off the horse’s back. The yard was still full of
younger boys training with swords under the watchful eye of experienced men.

  As she returned Athena to the stables, Moira tried to forbid herself to think about Gahan’s promise to give her a place, but there seemed no way to evict the echoes of their conversation from her mind. Athena settled onto a perch and began to groom herself.

  “Ye should have smothered the brat.”

  Moira spun around to find Bari glaring at her. She gasped as she realized what he’d said. “Ye cannae say such things.”

  He reached out and smacked her, the sound popping loudly in the mews.

  “Ye do nae tell me what to say…half sister. It would have served them right to lose their blood, since they took Sandra from me.”

  The light of insanity flickered in his eyes. The sting on her cheek was nothing compared to the growing fear that he was losing all grip on reality.

  “Bari, ye need to let go of yer hate. It is destroying ye,” Moira said, trying to reason with him.

  “I saw ye out, alone. I also saw that bastard riding out without even a single man at his back. There is only one reason he’d take such a risk.” He raked her from head to toe with his wild glare. “Ye look like Gahan’s whore now,” he snarled.

  She was pinned by the mews behind her. Bari pulled a small knife from the top of his boot and held it up.

  “I should slice yer throat and leave ye here for yer lover to find.”

  He was insane enough to do it. “Enough, Bari,” she said with more confidence than she felt. “Ye must make peace within yerself.”

  “What I need is vengeance for Sandra. She’ll nae rest until I avenge her.”

  His eyes glowed strangely, the knife hovering threateningly, until someone caught his wrist from behind and yanked him away.

  He sputtered, and the hawks all reacted to the sudden motion. They fluttered their wings and cried out as someone moved in front of Moira.

  “Ye’ll keep yer hands off what is mine, Bari Fraser.”

  Achaius emerged from the shadows of the mews, his retainers close. Two of them placed themselves between her and Bari.

  Bari stood up, unrepentant. “She’s Gahan Sutherland’s whore.” He pointed at the gown she wore. “She’s wearing his clothing like she’s proud of her ways. Ye should strangle her for adultery.”